On New Years eve in the midst of our annual hors d’ourve-off* I was sitting watching my feed on Facebook. I noticed that everybody was begging for the new year to begin, a clean slate, new beginnings.
2015 was not a year that I really considered to be particularly difficult. 2011 was one of those for sure, but it seemed to be a common theme for a lot of my friends.
The full year
One thing for sure was 2015 was FULL. Full to the brim of extreme workloads, over commitment and zero space to think. In 2015 I stepped out of my comfort zone in a big way and spoke at two amazing conferences, I built a bazillion membership websitesand online stores, taught 20 people how to build their own websites, co-launched four issues of ROOOAR and co-hosted two events. I also quit coffee (a big change from a 6 a day habit) and booze – a tea-totaller in the true sense.
I took 1 week off, but I didn’t allow myself to completely switch off (much to my husbands displeasure and totally not recommended). There were plenty of weekends, late nights and early mornings where I found myself chained to my computer, which was disappointing after all the hard work I did with the amazing Tash to get my weekends back.
In retrospect, 2015 was stifling and suffocating. Towards the end of the year I had to disconnect in a big way, not only to just to get some work done but because I was struck down with sickness.
And everything changes
As it turns out, this sickness isn’t a bad thing, it’s a good thing (depending on how you look at it). It’s actually morning sickness… and we’re coming to terms with how our entire world is about to change as our family goes from two to three.
As soon as I started thinking about how full my life was in 2015, knowing a baby was on the way, I started panicking .. how the the hell am I going to fit a baby in my life!? So it came down to one thing I needed to do, and that was to SIMPLIFY.
So of course, what is the first thing I did. Like any life changing event in my life, I declutter. I got my hands on the ever popular book “The life changing magic of tidying up” and ruthlessly got to injecting more ‘joy’ to my life (or ejecting non-joy).
After multiple trips to Life Line I came to the realisation the stuff wasn’t enough.
If you’ve been following me for a while you’ll know my constant battle with being a multipotentialite**, doing web design, running workshops, blogging and also co-running a digital magazine – ROOOAR.
Realising that I now have a deadline which I have absolutely have no control over, and I have no idea how this is all going to pan out – it really changes things. It changes a lot of things. I am realising that perhaps, I can do it all, but just not all at once. So the first step is to Konmari this stuff, drop the things that no longer bring me joy.
Once I took stock of all the things I had on my plate there was one thing that was clearly in last place when it came to joy-making and that was the magazine.
It’s time to let go
I am a creative being, and when I started thinking about it, somewhere along the way, my role became more of a cog in the machine – all the strategy and fun stuff was done for me. I was just answering emails, organising contributors, doing accounts, poorly proof reading articles and managing virtual assistants. Even with outsourcing a lot of the day to day stuff, my mental bandwidth was still consumed with all things ROOOAR.
Once all the busy work was done, there were was no room for creativity for me. Creativity is the real thing that fills my cup and the whole reason I was keen to start the magazine, a creative outlet other than client work. Hence, the magazine suddenly became joyless.
Don’t get me wrong, if I had the time I could definitely get creative with it but right now time is not a luxury I have. I needed to make a tough decision. I still see so much potential in the magazine and continue to think of the ‘what if’s’. I just know that as my priorities shift, now is the right time to let it go.
Anna will be taking full control of the magazine and I could not be happier that she is. I know she will give it her all, continue to wave her branding magic wand on it and turn it into the potential it has always been.
The magazine has definitely brought me incredible opportunities, helped me meet amazing inspirational people and has been without a doubt the best learning experience for me in terms of collaboration and the crazy business of the online world.
The biggest thing that I will miss from the Magazine is the amazing community we created. A tight knit group of amazing business ladies who lift each other and don’t pull each other down. It’s rare to see so much support from a group of strangers in this world and I am truly proud that I could help create such a space.
The magazine wont be the only thing I’ll be letting go of, just the first in many as I continue to declutter my business and prepare for motherhood, boss lady style.
Even though letting go of the magazine was a tough decision, I already feel lighter and the ideas are coming in fierce and strong for what’s next.
Watch this space.
Here is to the new chapter!
I’d love to know if you’ve struggled to let go of something to make space for something new?
*hors dourve-off is an annual thing we do for new years where we invite our friends over and compete for the best canape. We have some competitive foodie friends so it makes for a fun night.
**If you don’t know what a multipotentialite is check out this TEDx talk.